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Paying It Forward

authenticity awareness culture generosity giving intention kindness kristen bomas life guidance life lessons life mastery pay it forward reciprocity relationships Nov 25, 2024

What does it truly mean to pay it forward? What are we actually passing forward? And how do we go about doing it?

From the beginning, the truth has been known that what we put into the world eventually finds its way back to us. This isn’t just a learned concept; it’s wisdom that transcends conscious effort. It’s not about performing tasks with the expectation of something in return. For example, if we spread judgment, that energy is passed forward, and we eventually experience judgment in our own lives. On the other hand, when we offer random acts of kindness, we’ll receive life’s gifts in unexpected ways.

In both cases, there is only one flow: the act of paying it forward. There’s no focus on the return, and that’s key. When we judge others, we don’t do it expecting judgment in return! Yet, when many people give, they do so with the hope of receiving something back. The act becomes transactional, a closed loop, rather than a genuine, forward-moving gesture.

The phrase “pay it forward” speaks to this idea of direction—it’s not about receiving but giving. However, when everyone adopts this mindset of paying forward, the cycle inevitably returns to each of us. If we live with an awareness of what we put out into the world, it can transform both our lives and the lives of others. A simple act of kindness can ripple out and affect everyone we encounter, increasing the likelihood that we all start to receive more in return.

But does this mean you always need to be positive or think about others first? Not at all. It’s about recognizing when you’re struggling and asking yourself what you need to move through it. Being open to healing your wounds is a form of paying it forward too. By allowing yourself to heal, you’re passing forward the intention of overcoming pain, rather than being stuck in it.

In life, you are always paying forward something. The real question is: what are you paying forward, and are you aware of it? If you often find yourself worried or consumed by fear, your world will likely be filled with more events that fuel those feelings. But if you live with an open heart—full of compassion, acceptance, and the intention to heal—you’ll probably notice life bringing you more rewarding and healing experiences. This is paying forward with intention.

We often hear about paying it forward in the context of random acts of kindness, and these moments are wonderful opportunities to experience the joy of making a positive impact. For those who haven’t yet embraced the practice, these small acts offer a glimpse into how transformative paying it forward can be. Maybe it’s pitching in when someone in line is short a few dollars or covering someone’s grocery bill when their card doesn’t go through. Perhaps it’s as simple as letting someone merge in traffic or moving aside so the car behind you can make a turn. These acts of kindness are easy ways to spread positive energy throughout your day.

Unfortunately, many people still approach life with a mindset of “what’s in it for me?” My answer is simple: if everyone only took from the pot of gold, how quickly would it empty? But if everyone contributed, how quickly would that same pot overflow with abundance? If we each gave as much as we hoped to receive, the shared pot would never run dry.

When was the last time you paid it forward? Did you feel the openness and joy that came from the act? Or did you feel frustration, wondering when you would see the return? Try to let go of the expectation of getting something back. Just pay it forward, and one day, when you least expect it, you’ll be beautifully rewarded.

I wish you all a life filled with the abundance that comes from giving freely. Keep adding to the pot of gold, and trust that your own gifts will find their way back to you.

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